families values of india

Family Culture of India : Family is about joy and sharing. In India, the family culture is all about love and patience. A girl weds into a family and adjusts herself seamlessly to the rituals, routine and cuisine. Of late, one can see a lot of love marriages i.e. cross border mingling which is also being accepted by the elders in the family. Association with religious beliefs and sects is also followed by families as many families believe in a particular Guru or saint who guides them in their spiritual path. Families are also getting nuclear owing to independent lifestyle preference and also the concept where in both husband and wife is working and has demanding careers. This is quite common in metros where families are independent in their upbringing and yet love and respect the elders who reside separately. The earlier homes housed themselves together in very large families where one can actually see three or four generations put up together.

Certain families observe a matriarchal concept i.e. the groom resides in the house of the bride or also follows a tradition as per the bride’s ancestors. Generally India is patriarchal in the sense the children get the surname of the father and the wife changes her surname to follow that of the husbands. It is also a tradition in certain families that the wife changes her maiden name but again this concept is also changing. Indian families are very accommodating and willing to accept change. It is a concept to observe the karva chauth or the raksha bandhan with great aplomb. There is an occasion for gifting and seeking the blessings of elders. It is important to respect and hold certain family traditions which are unique in terms of cooking, rituals and beliefs. Families give a lot of importance to lighting the diya in the evening and also each person in family has a habit of doing the puja in his own way.

Metros are also seeing a lot of family value in celebrating birthdays and anniversaries by observing the rituals and also entertaining outdoors. The Indian culture has imbibed the right mix of western influence and yet maintaining the ethnic family tradition. There is more love in every family while blowing candles on the birthday cake and also lighting the diya to observe an Aarti for the birthday person.
Values can be defined as certain attitudes and beliefs that a person follows in his conduct. Those standards as per which an individual judges his own actions, whether he is right or wrong can be called as values. Value system comprises of all those beliefs and viewpoints that the parents pass on their next generation, they further pass it on to their offspring and so, the legacy goes on and on. Now let us come to the 'Indian Family Value System' - what is it and how does it influence individuals. In the Indian culture, there are certain rules and regulations that each and every child is taught right from his childhood.

Examples of Indian family values are - a young person should always touch the feet of his elders; he should never speak in a high or rude tone to those who are older to him; he should always give respect to elders and refer to them as 'aap'; he should not consume alcohol and tobacco or smoke cigarettes; he should respect women; he should always speak truth and try to engage in non-violent behavior; and so on. Most of the values that the parents impart to their children in India, as a part of the family value system, are similar in nature.

However, there may be some variations too, depending upon different families. For instance, in some houses, girls are not allowed top wear skirts after they reach certain age, while in others, they can wear anything, as long as it is decent and not body-revealing. Even these variations are quite trivial, as the basic essence behind them remains, more or les, the same. Most of the values that the Indian parents believe in imparting to their children do not appeal to the outside world. But then, it is these beliefs that make India the wonderful country that it is today.

Some other values that are part of India's cultural heritage are:

* Living peacefully and respecting each other's rights.
* Never ever compromising on integrity for the purpose of prosperity.
* Maintain strong bonds with the family members as well as relatives.
* Being hospitable to everyone who comes to your home, irrespective of his caste, creed, financial position or status.
* Treating guest as God i.e. 'Atithi Devo Bhava'.
* Remembering and bowing to God first thing in the morning.
* Indulging in yoga and meditation.
* Always taking the advice of elders in case of any important decision.
In India, unlike in America, the family plays a central role in shaping an individual’s future. In America, it is almost unimaginable for a person being offered a job to first seek his parents’ approval. But in India, that is almost always the case. It is amazing to see how often well-educated, independent professionals have to consult their parents before accepting a job offer or traveling abroad. At the core of Indian culture lies an innate respect for parents and other elders in the family, and usually no major decision is taken without consulting them. Parents often live with their married children, typically with a son. There is really no concept of a grown-up son or daughter ‘moving out of the house’ unless it is the result of circumstances like a job in a different city.

The arranged marriage is another practice that illustrates the importance Indians place on the family. A majority of marriages in India are arranged by families and several people are involved in the decision-making process. As popular belief goes, a marriage tied with many knots will not come undone. This is in complete contrast to the American culture where only two people tie the knot and experience has indeed shown us that it can be undone more easily. The divorce rate in America is much higher than in India.

American culture can sometimes appear to be too rebellious and independent, with children growing apart from their parents as they grow older. At other times Indian culture can seem too dependent on other people’s opinions and subject to unnecessary involvement from relatives, near and far. There are positives and negatives in both cultures. However it is important for foreign businessmen visiting India, especially those who are new, to remember that in general, important decisions are not made individually but as a family. This may not be apparent on a daily basis but will surface in critical situations.

Editor: Nisha Giri

The India survival Kit is divided into four sections:

I) Cultural tips for newcomers to India

* The Indian society: A few cultural tips for visitors
* Top ten cultural tips for expats and foreigners visiting India
* Cultural tips for visitors to India: Food & Restaurant etiquette
* Visiting exotic India? A primer on the diverse country
* Indian Family Values: What you must know before you visit India

II) Doing business in India

* Working in India: Work culture tips for newcomers
* Doing business in India: The role of culture
* Working and doing business with Indians? Indians can’t say No!

III) An American's diary

* Visiting India? Read the experiences of an American visitor Part 1
* Visiting India? Read the experiences of an American visitor Part 2

IV) Street English in India: Indian English and the Indian way of communication

* How Indians communicate: Cultural tips for visitors
* Terms commonly used by Indians: An ‘Indian English’ quiz
* Cultural tips for visitors to India: An American grapples with Indian English